Pondering what to do with my overgrown-lockdown-mane got me thinking this week…
I remembered how, growing up, I always wanted to have long hair, I was never being happy with the way it grew, always wanting it to be something it wasn’t.
I believed that when I had the long thick shiny hair of my imagination I would be happy. And as my hair is fine, fly-away & easily breakable I spent most of my teenage years desperately trying to work out how to make it grow thicker and longer and stronger just so that I could feel fabulous, and happy… (Spoiler: I never did grow my hair long)
Fast forward to my mid-thirties… after faffing about with bobs and various half-hearted attempts at growing it for two decades, I finally took the plunge and went super-short with my hair.
THAT was the moment when I suddenly felt like me!
Plus, everybody around me said “Amazing! You look just like you!”
And I’ve kept it very short ever since, except, you know, lockdown 🤷♀️
And it was only when I was reflecting this morning, as I washed my currently-accidentally-longer hair, that all of those years growing up, I was chasing after something that belonged to somebody else; and it was a pointless futile chase… and once I was thinking about that, it was just a short hop to thinking crikey, how many other things do we / I / you chase thinking it’s just what we need when it fact it’s not at all. And what a waste of time & energy that truly is.
(It got me thinking about Danielle LaPorte’s Desire Map; a great read if you have space on your reading list.)
What I really want to share, is that…
a/ what makes someone else happy isn’t necessarily going to make you happy – so check in with what makes YOU happy, not them; that is to say, don’t assume longer hair will make you happy because it works for your friend, or that you want to be a copywriter because you see someone else acing it.
b/ make the whole journey enjoyable, don’t just wait for the next big milestone to be happy. If you’re telling yourself “I will only be happy when my hair is long / when I’m earning six figures / when it’s not raining” you’re wasting right now!
So I’m inviting you to think about…
🌱are you chasing somebody else’s ideal?
🌱are you wanting something that just isn’t going to work for you?
and if the answer is…
🌱 how could you tune in to what will work for you instead, so that, just like my super-short haircut, people around you say WOW! that looks just like your thing!
And, even more importantly, you say WOW that feels just like my thing!
Because that, my friend, is where self-belief grows.
I’d love to hear how you get on – please do email and tell me! .
I believe in you, are you with me?
Checking in with being on the right path for you, and how you can enjoy the whole journey, is something my 1-1 clients are exploring in my 6 week coaching package, click here to find out more & book your discovery call.